somehow dont the mood to do anything... i thought i'll be okay, but the worry and fear is getting on me, maybe because i know i did put in a lot of effort for it, that's why i dont want to do badly. i want my parents to be proud of me, i wanna prove some teachers wrong, okay, maybe one teacher that i wont get a B4 for amath..
for the first time, i dont even feel like searching for kim hyun joong's activities or watch korean shows or watch television.. i wanna sleep so that i will stop thinking crazily but i dont wanna sleep as well because tmr will then come soon...
i think im getting a temporary depression which may be over by tmr, i hope...
i dont wanna do badly, i really dont want to, i wanna do well, i wanna be able to get into nj, i wanna my parents to say, 'well done, daughter', i wanna cry on stage because i did well, i want all my beloved friends to do well as well, so that we can be happy together, i dont want to feel regretful...
somehow, i think im resembling mildred from F451, immersing myself into music to escape thoughts..
i hate hearing laughter now, i did laughed just now after watching a funny thing on tv, for 10secs, then the image of olevels ran through my head and i stopped, feeling awfully worried again...
these anxiety, fear,confusion will end soon right?
haha, i sound extreme, yea, just venting my worries here, hehe, read if you like.. lol, but i hope it wont affect your feelings..
jiayou, baobeis!!! :D
mum, im okay, my mentality is still fine, dont look so worried.. :P